Tuesday, June 14, 2011

How Can I Miss You If You Don't Go Away?

"Every day, in every way, I am getting better and better." - Emile Coue

WARNING: This post contains sappiness and over-sentimentality. This is what comes from me realizing I can turn up my volume at midnight and not wake anybody up because there's nobody there.

Yesterday morning, both of my sisters left with my grandparents, who live within an hour's drive of Niagara Falls. I'll be joining them in two weeks, but for now, that means I'm living as an only child. Especially now that since my mom is working as the secretary at her school rather than in the library, she doesn't have the summer off.

While I enjoy the quiet and the lack of people trying to nail me for not doing my chores, I've also been a bit lonely-- the past two days, plus last week when they had school and I didn't. I've been keeping some sort of music playing as much as possible.

Really I'm fine and have been enjoying myself, but I have to wonder...how do actual only children do it? I like being alone, but I don't like having to be alone. Siblinghood is a weird thing;  it's a relationship pretty much solely based on sharing, ironic as that may seem. There's tension and competition and just plain fighting, sure. But even if you aren't "close," there's still that rather unique bond.

My best friend is probably the person who knows me best. She's my first confidant, who I feel totally comfortable talking to. But my sisters live with me. We grew up together. We took baths together. We've violently slaughtered virtual demons together (well, I've done that with my best friend too, but...) 
We've seen each other at our worst (and have said some shockingly cruel things to each other), and we sometimes don't understand each other. We tear each other down and then we build each other up again. We've been together our entire lives, and it's hard for me to comprehend a life without that kind of relationship.

So a message to my sisters, since I'm going to send them the link to this post: Don't die. Stay far away for the duration of the next two weeks because I'm partying it up here at home and hacking your computers to read your email and stealing all of your money and stuff, but as much as it pains me to admit it, I want you both back here in July. Okay? You're stuck with me. (And yes, that's a World of Warcraft joke in the title-- blood elf female. And no, I didn't know that off the top of my head.)

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