On Listening

“Emily Dickinson wrote that success is counted sweetest by those who ne’er succeed. And so too, youth is counted sweetest by those who are no longer young. Nostalgia is inevitably a yearning for a past that never existed.” - John Green


But if we think it existed, what then? (See An Abundance of Katherines)


Anyways. In relation to me, Script Frenzy is now going to be re-named Do Review Packets For AP Chemistry Frenzy. Instead of writing 4-ish pages of dialogue per day...I get to do 3-ish pages of that. Every day. Fun times.


So today I was thinking about listening, because I have been told that I'm a good listener, and I was wondering exactly what that meant, since it clearly means more than that my ears work well.


"Listening" is generally defined as using your ears to receive and interpret sound waves.
Well, by that definition, the following scenario counts as listening:


Person 1: "(is talking)"
Person 2: "Mhm. Yeah. No. Cool."
Person 1: "Are you even listening to me?"
Person 2: "Of course I am. And I even have a vague impression of what you're talking about."


I've protested that definition myself: "You're listening to me, but you aren't hearing me," meaning that my words are going in one ear and out the other.


And that's not "good listening" either.


So here's what I think good listening is, and it doesn't have to be through sound: Paying attention to what the person speaking is saying, and not only paying attention, but also remembering it. Which sort of ties back to the quote at the start of the post-- if you don't remember something, it didn't happen. So listen to people, or else their words will have been in vain. Not only does this mean you're being a good person, I think, but it also means a heck of a lot to the person speaking when you remember whatever it was when it comes up again in conversation. We humans like to feel that we and our experiences matter to others. We like to feel loved.


Then again, we also need to forgive people when they forget things...but that's another post entirely and kind of defeats the purpose of this one, so...


**steps off soapbox with grace and poise**


(What's a soapbox?)

Coping Via Science

(Note: This is being posted several hours after it was written.)


"Unless we remember we cannot understand." -  E. M. Forster


I'd like to insert a "correctly" after remember, but yes.


This post is going to contain several interesting ideas; however, I can't take credit for any of them. Most of this is coming from my dad on the ride to school this morning. But before, I get to those...
...I just found out that my great-uncle died at some point last night, from cancer. I didn't really know him at all, but...you know.


We didn't know about it this morning, but the points my dad made are only more poignant now.


As part of his current obsession with immortality, singularity, and the extension of the human life-span, he's been listening to a lot of different podcasts and lectures and reading news articles and such. One of these was about DNA, so bear with me while I explain a little bit of the science.


So when cells divide, the DNA in the center of the nucleus splits into two strands, each of which becomes the DNA in the center of one of the daughter cells. You probably knew that already.
Now, the thing that you might not have known (mainly because I didn't) is that there's this thing on the end of the DNA (whose name I don't remember). That thing gets a little bit shorter every time the cell divides, and once it's all gone, the cell can't divide, so it just dies.
The theory is that once we can figure out how to stop that thing from getting shorter, we'll be able to live forever in healthy bodies.
There are two problems with that:
1. We don't know how to make it happen
2. That would mean uncontrolled cell growth, which is...cancer, basically.


So you see why he's dwelling on the problem.
He, his brother, and one of his sisters were/are planning on driving up there tomorrow. It just sucks that they're too late.
I think the worst part of it is the waiting. Waiting the 5 hours to get to my uncle's tomorrow night. Waiting the 8 more to get up to NY where everyone else is. And that's not even counting him sitting at the car dealership waiting for the repair to be finished like he is now. I'm just hanging out on Google chat keeping him company and his mind occupied.


Personally, I'm more worried about my grandparents. Not only do they have to mourn, but they also have to deal with all of the people flooding into town, and making sure my great-grandma and great-great-aunt are okay and in the loop about everything...


So yeah, that's what's going on over here.
It's interesting to see what different people use as coping mechanisms, though. Dad, for instance, is as we speak devoting himself to intellectually thinking through and coming up with general solutions for every global problem he finds both interesting and concerning. Yes, this is what my father does while sitting on benches at car dealerships. You see where I get it.


(Also, I'm going to be quoting him next post, because he's said some really interesting and insightful stuff.)


My coping mechanism for this? Well, I'm mostly-pleased to announce that I'll be participating in Script Frenzy this year. Actually participating, unlike last year when I just used it as a spring board for typing up the ridiculously bad Oz parody I wrote with some friends in middle school.

In Which I Am Paranoid Despite The Box Post

"What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living." - Doug Larson


"I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confine themselves to facts." - Mark Twain


Today's post is one of the ones that matches my original intentions for this blog. These are few with far between, so savor it. Or not, since you probably started following for the content that I actually do post, but no matter.


Remember two months ago when I had a request for the full manuscript of The Clockwork Experiment? It's been two months, so I wrote the agent an email last night. I received an automated response email saying that she was sorry, but she'd be out of the office until March 8th.


March 8th was a long time ago, people.


If I don't hear back by next Monday night, I think I'll write to the head/founder of the agency to see what's going on. Hopefully I'm just being paranoid and over-reactive (and you know from the Box post that I'm generally rather paranoid when it comes to people I don't know at all).


But I went on Absolute Write to see what people were saying about the group, and all of it seemed pretty positive. There was even a couple posts from this year (although those were just "I sent her a query today" and from even earlier in January than me, "I sent her a full and will update the thread when I hear back."


Dissect and analyze with your more-rational-than-mine brains.

The Box: Inside or Outside?

“There’s no amount that is too great or small. We’re just helping people get out of a situation that sucks” - Hank Green on the situation in Japan


So my friend over at Thief of Words wrote a post today that reminded me of something I'd meant to post about awhile ago but didn't.
Her post is entitled "Thinking outside of the bloody stupid imaginary box." 


I would think that most of us were raised, or at least taught in school, to think outside of the box and come up with ideas other than the obvious.
For the most part, I approve of this very much.


However, it seems to cause some problems when it comes to people, and people are generally the things that matter most.


So if I'm trying to either figure out the motivation behind a person's actions or guess what he/she will do next, I'm going to think outside of the box as well as inside of it, because that's what I've been taught to do.
Thinking outside of the box in terms of motivation and possible future actions is not a good idea, because then you end up picturing all of the most horrible scenarios, and even if you know X Y and Z aren't likely because they're way out there, they make M look tame, even though an inside-box thinker would understand that M isn't likely to be the case either.


Which leads to paranoia, unnecessary anxiety, and irrationality. All of which suck regardless of whether you're the perpetrator or the receptor.


But thinking outside of the box is such a good skill to have in pretty much every other instance, so it's definitely a good thing. It's just really annoying that you can't turn it off. Knowing it's a problem will help, of course, because you can tell yourself to stop worrying and explain exactly why the anxiety is stupid, but there's always that "Well, what if?"


Hopefully "if" wasn't after all, and hopefully things will work out and your paranoia didn't screw things up too much, but in the midst of things, there's no knowing. And that's not fun at all.

An Abundance of Quotes Part 13

"It's almost as if our society values opinions more than it values knowledge." - Hank Green


"As I trail off, I hear them making one another laugh - not the words exactly, but the cadence, the rising and falling pitches of banter. I like just listening, just loafing on the grass. And I decide that if we get there on time but don’t find her, that’s what we’ll do: we’ll drive around the Catskills and find a place to sit around and hang out, loafing on the grass, talking, telling jokes. Maybe the sure knowledge that she is alive makes all of that possible again - even if I never see proof of it. I can almost imagine a happiness without her, the ability to let her go, to feel our roots are connected even if I never see that leaf of grass again." - Paper Towns


“The idea is that for ten minutes, we forget that we have feelings. And we forget about protecting ourselves or other people and we just say the truth. For ten minutes. And then we can go back to being lame.” - Will Grayson, Will Grayson


"I've seen the future and it's much like the present only longer." - Dan Quisenberry


"There are three musts that hold us back: I must do well. You must treat me well. And the world must be easy." - Albert Ellis


"The hardest problems are the ones that most need solving." - John Green, because you all know I definitely don't quote that man enough on here.


"Genius is the ability to renew one's emotions in daily experience." - Paul Cezanne

In Which I Administer Some Medicine

Dear Joss Whedon,


I love you.


Sincerely,


Elf Army


There's my emotion-driven Random Thought. Now on to the actual post.


When I walk over to my grandma's after school, I usually get her mail for her. Today that mail contained a newsletter thingy from the church I technically belong to (notice the technically-- if you've been around here long enough, you know what that means, and if you haven't, you're probably smart enough to figure it out). 
The back of this newsletter read something like "This Sunday, Dr. (Name) will be coming with his presentation Understanding Islam: What Makes Muslims Tick." Dr. Name has apparently published a couple books detailing the best ways to "administer Christ to Muslims."


There are a number of things I find wrong with that, and I find them to be very, very wrong. Seriously, the more I think about it, the angrier I get.


So this guy's job, basically, is to show the church members exactly why Muslims are evil/bad/wrong? Nice. Very nice.


Thing That Is Wrong Number One: Inter-faith education should be about similarities in theology, not differences. Teaching the differences only increases prejudice and ill-feeling, while most religions have way more in common than their followers tend to believe, and this misconception only fuels the emphasis on differences.


Thing That Is Wrong Number Two: "What makes Muslims tick" ? Really? Last I checked, any given Muslim is first and foremost a human being. I highly doubt what makes them tick is terribly different from what makes any other person tick. Implying that there's some Secret Muslim Motivator once again only fosters suspicion and prejudice. Also, it's rude.


Thing That Is Wrong Number Three: "administer Christ to Muslims"? That...that makes it sound like a disease. Angerangerangeranger. This is not helping anything.


Thing That Is Wrong Number Four: I'm generally against religious evangelism (I won't tell you your theology is objectively wrong-- only that I disagree, and that your intolerance most certainly is wrong), so the idea of writing entire books on tactics seriously rubs me the wrong way.


I'm sure there are other things to be added to the list, but those are the ones sticking out to me right now. Like my dad said regarding rock4ever95's post that I linked to, there are many much-more serious problems to be dealing with in the world than intolerance. If people would get over their differences, we could focus on the more pressing issues. Plus, intolerance is something that needs to be addressed in and of itself. Intolerance, not Islam, is the disease that needs curing. (And blogging is an actual helpful tool by which to do that, Teacher Of Mine Who Thinks Blogging Is Useless, thank you.)


(Also: feedback on the interview? Were the questions good? Do you want to see more interviews on here in the future? I seriously wasn't just fishing for views, despite what I may joke about. I may stalk my stats page obsessively, but I'm like Alan in that I only post/sell what I myself would want to read/buy. Or at least that's what I try to do.)


Random Personal Tidbit For Those Of You Who Are Remotely Interested: our band is headed off to Festival tomorrow, and one of our pieces is the final movement of a Lord of the Rings symphony, entitled "Hobbits." Party to follow. Should be fun.

Interview: Alan Lastufka

Today's post is something new and exciting that I've never done before: an interview with an actual living human being. Or perhaps he actually had a robot write his answers, but that seems unlikely, so we shall disregard that.
This Human Being's name is Alan Lastufka, co-founder and acting president of DFTBA Records. Thank you so much, Alan, both for helping me out with my Economics project and letting me post the interview on here, and for generally being very helpful and cool in all of our interactions upon this thing known as The Internet. 
I realize that since many of you are familiar with the company, some of the questions might be a little "duh" to you, but it was for my homework, and my teacher isn't quite as aware of the YouTube scene, and I included them for the sake of comprehensiveness.
Let it be noted that I was actually listening to DFTBA Records music while compiling the interview into a Powerpoint.
We shall pretend that I said hello to him, and he said hello back, because I really just emailed him some questions, and he emailed me back the answers. Anyways, onward. Interview to be seen after the jump.

Fear Part 4: Hate

This post comes to you courtesy of a variety of things/events/people, but the only one I can link to is this, which is very good, and while it's related, it's about something else, so go read it.


Now that you have read it (and if you haven't, go do so right now), I would like to begin by saying that I find it very difficult to comprehend the concept of having such a high level of hate (as some do) based on such a thing.
And comprehending it is something I've had to do recently, since I'm currently writing from the perspective of one such person. It hasn't been easy to write it well, but it has been fascinating to try.
So there's two of the things.


The third is that when my grandma and I were leaving to go see my sister's track meet this afternoon, I opened her car door to find a wasp.


Now, I am terrified of bees and all of their relatives. I don't know why, but I am.


However, my immediate vocal reaction was not one of fear. It was "I HATE BEES. I HATE THEM I HATE THEM I HATE THEM."


How did I make the jump from fear to hate? It doesn't make much sense. But it happened, and it happens to other people as well in worse contexts than insects.


So we profess to hate what we fear, and quite often (although not the case with my example) we fear what we do not understand. That's the basis for the writing project mentioned above: growing to understand. 


It's ironic, too. Because while my narrator is growing to understand that homosexuality isn't the most Evil Thing Ever, as I'm writing it, I'm growing to understand her (despite not actually agreeing, of course.)

An Abundance of Quotes Part 12

"Sometimes dreams are wiser than waking." - Black Elk


“I try not to hate anything. Allowing hate in your life just means you’re carrying around excess baggage on behalf of something that’s not worth your effort.” - Kristina Horner, the person I would want to be if I wasn't myself


“I found myself wishing there were some way for those of us on one side of an ocean to tell people on the other side that we were thinking of them. A way that I could say that not only to the people of Japan, but also to Dorothy, who found that baby girl in 1961. But images can travel in a way that our thoughts cannot, and that night I felt sad and frustrated that technology can never quite bridge the oceans between us.” - John Green


“[Comics] do provide us, I think, with a great opportunity to analyze ourselves and what we’re becoming obsessed with, and what we’re becoming afraid of. Interestingly, those two things: often the same thing.” - Hank Green


"Reading maketh a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man." - Francis Bacon, 1625


"As a rule, people don't collect books; they let books collect themselves." - Arnold Bennett, 1926 That is so, so true.


There was also a great quote/discussion from an episode of Bones I was watching a couple days ago about how a writer's views/thoughts-at-the-time assimilate themselves into his/her writing subconsciously, but I didn't write it down at the time. I know it happens to me a heck of a lot, though.

In Which Rock4Ever95 Makes Me Feel Bad About Myself For Good Reason

Holy wow, that post got a lot of traffic. I can't say I'm surprised, though.


So I guess I'll address it.


The concept of meat itself being gross is simply very, very foreign to me (although, rock4ever95, you will be pleased to know that your thoughts/arguments on the subject are making me seriously self-conscious about my omnivorism. And I'm actually glad about that, despite it being rather annoying.) simply because I haven't been raised that way.


The post wasn't supposed to be about vegetarianism. So I'm sorry if I've offended people. It was supposed to be about your actions supporting your values, rather than not-necessarily-reasonable rules, my thoughts on which happened to stem from my cousin's story.


But on the subject of vegetarianism...you know what, my views on that are far too complicated and contradictory right now to write a coherent, truthful post. 


The short facts of it: 

• I have been raised to eat meat without a second thought.
• In the past year, this has begun to bother me.
• That Bothering-ness has increased considerably in the past month or so, for a number of reasons
• It's something I think about quite often, and change is happening.

But I want to thank you guys for the comments, because they've been very interesting and thought-provoking. (Now leave me to my carnivorous guilt. Seriously, I should not have read those comments before going to bed.)


Ah, adolescence is fun.