Hi. I have a lot of quotes for you today. Some are funny and some are not. That's what comes from going to school. But first, let's have the ones from the notorious Google Reader.
“There’s no way not to lose fights. That doesn’t mean that there aren’t fights worth fighting. But, it does mean that thinking that you’ll only be happy when you win is the surest way of never being happy.” - Hank Green
"Everything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening." -a poster someone gave my math teacher for laughs.
"If you don't have answers, you must have questions." -letter from my math teacher to students & parents
And then there is English...which I'm not going into in this post. For now, I'll just say that there are a lot of posts labeled "philosophy" in the near future...
Just to get this out of the way so you all know (because it came up at the meeting last night, for those not there): Yes, I used to be very into Twilight. I was just very quiet about it. Then I "recovered from Twilightus," as my dad would say.
Last night I asked the question "Which is worse: to have great parents whom you love very much and are loved by suddenly have no idea who you are, or to have so-so/on the bad side of okay parents who suddenly want you dead, or at least wish you didn't exist?
All of you chose the first one, if I remember correctly.
I agree.
On the way home, I asked my dad what he thought. He thought the first one was better. I asked him why, and he said "There comes a time in everyone's life, usually around your age, where you realize that your parents don't actually know you. I can tell you I love you hundreds of times a day, but you'll still wonder whether I would if I knew the real you."
Considering that the question spawned from a nightmare I had in which he a) had no idea who I was b) was married to some other woman who wasn't my mom and c) was bothered by my reaction to him not knowing me, I would say that this point has already arrived.
But I don't think it's a point. I think it's a wave (ha, sorry for the physics reference). That point in my relationship with him was subconscious and happened at a different time than, say, the conscious point with my grandma.
Ah, adolescence. How I both love and despise thee.
Speaking of which, when I was in maybe 3rd grade he said "Your teenage years will probably be both the best and worst years of your life." This is true so far.
My grandma also thought the first one was better when I asked her this afternoon. She said that with the first one there was always the chance of love, whereas with the second there wasn't much hope at all.
And last but not least, here is a spoiler-free commentary on Mockingjay. I still haven't started.
I answered the first one because I think it is better to be loved and know what to be loved feels like. It's heartbreaking to know that someone you love ends up not remembering you but you still have the memories of feeling loved by that person. The idea that people who are supposed to love you would end up hating you is more than sad, it's a tragedy that I think ruins the soul of the person who should have been loved.
ReplyDeleteYour dad is so cool. I have told you that before, right?
The hard thing is to have parents who love you but don't know you...or hold on to what you once were. My relationship with my mother as an adult is very strained. She loves me, I love her. But she has a perception of who I am and it is nowhere near who I really am. She has surmised it and that is that and refuses (ignorantly) to really try to know who I am, which is very important to me.
So hopefully, your relationship with your dad will stay open, despite any downward spirals that _may_ come with high school and just growing up in general. It sounds like an amazing relationship that shouldn't be greatly affected but keep that in mind when you start thinking about how 'my parents just don't get me!'
I know he is. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd I think we are pretty open with each other. Far more so than most fathers and daughters, I think. I hope it stays that way as well.